A person who uses threats or violence against another person is always responsible for their own actions. It cannot be blamed on alcohol or another person. It’s OK to get angry, upset or feel bad – but it’s never OK to hit, threaten or say hurtful things to another person.
If you or someone in your family is the victim of violence, it might sometimes feel like it’s your own fault. You might have thoughts like “If I hadn’t come home late, dad wouldn’t have gotten mad and hit mum”. But, it is NEVER you or the victim of the violence who is to blame. The abuser is always responsible for their own actions.